HAHAHAHA.......

People are funny.... really funny.... they get SO sentimental about things... you know... take things personally and stuff....
Check out this link... it's some reviews about the movie that got released last month or so I think... Cheeni Kum... (less sugar... I should like it... I like less sugar... ;-) )... check out the reviews... people seem SO let down by the movie.. i almost pity them... i would more if i could stop laughing...
http://www.nrilinks.com/entertainment/movies/reviews/BW1687.asp

I dont know how the movie is... I haven't seen it yet... Wasn't even planning to.. But after reading this.. I guess it's atleast worth a download... ;-)

Have a great weekend!!


~K.

I HATE music

I hate the power that it has over me. I hate the way it controls my display of emotions. Things that I would generally digest, music expels out of my system like an emetic.

If I listen to music when I'm happy, I get this unstoppable urge to sing loudly and dance. And I cant sit straight in the office anymore. If I listen to music when I'm sad or feeling lonely, I get depressed. I think of all things that make me sad and then I cry. And I refuse to see the happiness that I might have around me.

People who claim that music brings them up when they are down, makes them feel good when they are sad and so on, are either fooling themselves or maybe not listening to the right kind of music. Because when you do, it just intensifies your emotions. Or let me speak for myself. It does that to me. It exposes me to what I'm really thinking even when I am capable of hiding it from my own self. So I keep listening to music as one of those really intimate activities that I don't share with everyone. To me, it is one of the most harmful addictions that I could get into. Though I do claim to hate it, I wouldn't dare to dream of a life without music.

To whoever recognized the first notes and identified them as music, go to hell!! And then listen to music. I hope it makes you feel better...


~K.

Cuidado... A Reprise....

Just realized a couple of days back... that this dude on the Wet Floor sign... the one in yellow... reminds me of Yossarian.... (of the Catch 22 fame.. )

Was telling a friend about it... and he disagreed.. so I thought I'd put it up for general public comments!!! :D

This pic btw... is from the Empire State Building... I don't know... but I just had to take it... ;-)


~K.

Playing Cinderella..

This is my 3rd weekend here... and the 1st that I'm actually spending in good (??) ol' Stamford... and with nothing to do and nowhere to go it becomes a lil tough to spend time. And there's just this much that you can watch TV or surf the net looking for absolutely nothing. And in a country like US which has 4 time zones, you gotta check your watch before you call friends in other zones.. (esp those in opposite coasts) So... what did I do?
Went to Macy's. God bless that store!! I just went around the store trying dresses I had no intention of buying or couldn't afford even if I wanted to buy!!! Man... I must have tried some of the prettiest things I've ever worn in my life. Way out of my budget. But so wonderful that I actually thought of saving until I can afford them. Sigh.... I wish I could have taken a snap in all of those beautiful dresses. Don't think I can go again tomorrow... will probably try some other store... ;-)
Anyway.. until the next "trial" comes along.... hmmm... sweet dreams, princess!!


~K.

WHAT?????

I just changed my blog layout and THAT's when i noticed.... Only 3 blogs this year???? Damn!!!


~K.

Cuidado! Piso Mojado

That's one of the first warnings that you get when you land in the US... provided you visit the restroom that is. What does it mean? Caution! Wet Floor. :)

Oh well, here I am, back again in the US. For the third time. This time in Connecticut. Just 40 miles North of one of my favourite cities in the world, NYC. What's more? I might be relocated to another place during the course of my stay here in the US.
When I was coming here, my thoughts ran way back to my childhood days... As a kid, I wanted to travel a lot. I wonder now if I should have asked for money. Anyway, here's the moral... wishes do come true. If you are smart, you provide the extent (or scale) of realization of your wish in the wish itself. (something like - I want to travel for a maximum of 100000 miles for a maximum of 10 years). And you'll be more specific in terms of the company you want with you. (hint - I want to travel with my mom and dad and sis and bro-in-law and nephew and friends.. something like that). Want more? How about the mode of travel and how much you want to pay out of your own pocket and where you want to stay? Well well.. I think you are getting the hint now.

For the "well" wishers (pun intended), that's something to rejoice about. Just don't forget that warning though - Cuidado! Piso Mojado!!


~K.

Honey I.. er... shrunk the world???

I don't know who did... but someone did for sure...

A group of my very close friends had a reunion in NY.. ( a reunion without me???? Damn! !*&&?*%$$#%#!*) And they had a lot of fun... which goes without saying.. lotsa friends together... after a long time... one of them married... so his spouse needs to be initiated to what all the group has been up to... and that too in NY!!!
And they were kind enough to upload the snaps and send them to the lesser mortals... While flipping through the snaps I suddenly found a face which seemed familiar... and it turns out that a guy I'd met during college days in one of the college fests is the friend of the married couple... wow!!!
Wow point number 2... I see a pic of this lady who is again familiar... A quick visit to some of the sites I keep frequenting reveals that she is a girl whose blogs I've been reading a lot... and getting some inspirations from... (Amrita's musings) is a grad school friend of one of my friends again....
Whew!!! It gets tiring virtually running into friends...

And I say to myself... Is the world becoming too small or are there too few people in it???

I hope I am present in the next such reunion... wherever in the world it happens...
Amen!!!


~K.

Yet another Book Review

Name of the book - Nineteen Eighty Four
Author - George Orwell

Description* - Nineteen Eighty Four is the classic novel of our time. A powerful warning against the evils of a totalitarian state and a passionate plea for human liberty, it paints an appalling picture of love crushed by terror. Big Brother, Newspeak, Doublethink and the Thought Police are part of a world to which Orwell looks forward with spine-chilling accuracy - a world which some say is with us now.

(Most importantly) My views -
Was reading Nineteen Eighty Four last week. After a long time read something so disturbing. I don’t know exactly what it was about that book that hit me so hard, but I felt myself going through all the instances where I had my happiness with me, in me, and yet I lost it. What was depressing was that I could remember each of those instances to the minutest of details. And my failure to hold on to them. I could see all those events happening in front of me all over again. And all I could do was stare like a witness to my own life. I couldn’t put myself in my own position and change things. Funny (if you might call it funny) part is that even the time when those things actually happened, I knew what I was going to lose. Hated to see myself losing all over again.

I don’t know why, but for some reason the song Iris is coming to my mind now –

All I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Coz sooner or later it’s over
I just don’t want to miss you tonight.

..........................................................................................................................................

The My views section came out while I was mailing a friend about what I thought about the book. I might not even have read it had he not mentioned the book in yet another one of our weird conversations and sold me on it (the book.. not the conversation). Many Thanks.
And of course, the guy who lent me the book. My project mate. Another avid reader. That's the least I can say of someone who read this book when he was in class XI. Hats Off!! And Thanks too!!

Anyway, acknowledgements apart, the book "Nineteen Eighty Four" is a FANTASTIC read. It is depressing and strong. And lingering. Read it if you get it. And if you dare.



~K.

* - Taken from the cover of the book.

High Five!!!!

Read this here at Amrita's blog. And welll.... I got Tagged.
I've been working on this for about a week now... And finally I'm almost done!!

Here we go. My milestones -

Ten Years Ago
1. I was 14 years old.
2. My Class X board exams were the most important thing for me.
3. Had some awesome friends.
4. Geekism was THE way to be.
5. Backstreet boys and Boyzone were the definition of music.

Five Years Ago
1. I was STILL a teenager.
2. Suffered my first heartbreak and wondered if love really was all bull.
3. My sister got married and I realized love isn't all bull.
4. Made some awesome friends.
5. Got enrolled in the School of Rock ;)

Last One Year
1. Started writing on this blog. (or was it year before last.. hmmmm... )
2. Thought a lot. (Man... is that or is that an achievement)
3. Finally got a couple of bosses worth admiring!!!
4. Went to US twice and made some (more) awesome friends..
5. Became a proud Mausi of a darling little boy!!!

Yesterday
1. I wrote the CAT yet again.
2. Thought again.
3. Found out I wasn't as scared of exams as I thought I was.
4. Realized there's still SO much I haven't done yet.
5. I realized I want to stay 24 all my life.

Five Things Planned for the Next Five Years
1. Study.
2. Get into a field of work I can relate to.
3. Read a classic.
4. Fall in love.
5. Stay 24.

Five Yummy Things
1. Pancakes at IHOP.
2. Eggs.
3. A meal of Arhar ki Dal, Chawal, Bhindi ki Sabzi and Dahi. (The kind mom n dad make)
4. Good, hot, coffee. (less sugar please)
5. Chicken or Fish curry. (The kind sis makes :) )

Five Songs I know by Heart
Ooooohhhh.. there are SO many!!!!!!
1. Hey Jude, I wanna hold your hand, We can work it out (and so many other Beatles songs)
2. Shine on you Crazy Diamond, Comfortably Numb, Wish you were here, Hey you, Coming back to life (lotsa Pink Floyds too!)
3. Lakdi ki Kathi :)
4. Kesariya Balam (The Lekin version :) )
5. Kajrare... (almost... but ummm... never mind!!!) ;)

Five Things I'd do if I had the Money
1. Travel all over India.
2. Travel all over the World.
3. Take flying lessons.
4. Quit working.
5. Write a book and not worry about its sale.

Five Places I Escape to
1. Music.
2. Shower.
3. Bed.
4. Balcony.
5. Books.
6. Gym.
7. Sea shore.

Five TV Shows
These are the ones I used to like watching. Nowadays I'm a victim of CAS.
1. Whose line is it anyway.
2. Yes Minister.
3. Faulty Towers.
4. Everybody Loves Raymond.
5. The Wonder Years.

Five Things I Can't Live Without
1. Water.
2. Food.
3. Humour.
4. Music.
5. Sleep.

Five Things I Can Live Without
1. Coding. :)
2. White Chocolates. (I still don't know just where is the chocolate in it... :P)
3. A Swiss bank account
4. Cold (running nose... blocked nose... aaaarrrggghhh.. how I hate cold!!!)
5. My Mustang... ;)

Five Favourite Cuisines
Now this is too much. All food is my favourite. Nope... no discrimination against food.
Lemme try nonetheless -
1. Mom cooked food.
2. Dad cooked food.
3. Sis cooked food.
4. Anything non veg.
5. Anything veg.

Five Best Places to Visit
1. Home (in Delhi)
2. Home (in Bangalore)
3. Nainital, Uttaranchal (beautiful hills, wonderful air... heaven)
4. Friends' places. (Doesn't matter who or where or when... it's called 24 hr friendship!!)
5. New York

Your turn. Same questions. :)

~K.

Walk of Life!

I love rains, despite the messy muck and mucky mess that they bring up after they're gone. But does that matter? Recently I discovered that the mucky mess isn't the only kind of mess that rains can put one into.

Last weekend I was walking back from a friend's place to mine. It was raining. And I was glad. Had been such a long time since I'd walked in the rain. Part of the luggage that I was carrying was my laptop. But, I do declare, it didn't even strike me once to protect it from all that water. I reached home, happy. Even messaged my friend how wonderful a walk I'd had. An hour or so later, I checked my laptop. Conked! And no, it didn't even say goodbye.

Had quite a thoughtful weekend. Thinking about what to do, what to say when asked. Will I be liable for it. Will I be held responsible for it... You know... the works.
Finally what it came down to was me returning the laptop to the office. My work gets hampered a little. I may lose the flexibility (convenience) of working through different offices until I get a replacement next week. I may have to spend 4 hours a day in my daily commuting to and from office. Quite a few cons I must say.

And yet... I still want to walk in the rain.

So help me God.

*Amen*


~K.

Letter from an Uncle to his Niece

"... Like nirvana, romance perhaps defies also pre-conditions and stereotypes. One may get it, one may not.
Wishing you all the best in your own pursuit.
Jeeti raho; mil jaaye to mast raho, aur naa mile to bhi.
Love always"


~K.

ps: It is unfair to take the credit of this piece of advice and hence the article. My apologies. And a world of thanks to the source of it. :)

Dreams - one a penny.

Dreams...
Amazing little things arent they? Keep coming and going inside your head. And some of them manage to stay inside.
The thing to figure out is... how do you know which ones to cherish as nice, pleasant thoughts and which ones to start chasing? How do you know the dream will be just as beautiful as reality as it is otherwise? What if you spend a lifetime chasing your dream, working hard to materialise it only to realize it wasn't worth it?

On the flip side, how do you get rid of a dream that's planted in your head? How do you let go of the beauty... the strength... the happiness that this dream brought along with it? How do you not reach out to that happiness and make it yours knowing all the while that if you don't, it's lost forever?

I read somewhere today... on a billboard... If it's worth a dream, it's not worth a sacrifice.
Wrong thing to read man. And at way too wrong a time. It kinda set back my "renovations" by ... hmmm... quite a period of time.
Maybe I'm better off dreaming about my Mustang, and my houses and my dogs and food rather than anything else. Maybe it is as material a world as it is made out to be. Who knows...

~K.

You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one.

Here comes the Son!!!

Here Comes The Sun
(George Harrison)
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
And I say it's all right
Little darlin' it's been a long cold lonely winter
Little darlin' it feels like years since it's been here

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
And I say it's all right

Little darlin' the smiles returning to their faces
Little darlin' it seems like years since it's been here

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
And I say it's all right

Little darlin' I feel the ice is slowly meltin'
Little darlin' it seems like years since it's been clear

Here come the sun, here comes the sun
And I say it's all right.

---
For my little darling.
It's not just alright... it's downright wonderful if I may say!!!

Love,
~K.

Renovation in progress.... Please bear with me!!!

... that's assuming you care... ;-)
But then, that's me... I always assume the best for myself!!! :D

Anyway, all jokes and other yada-yada apart, the purpose of writing this (ahem) unassuming piece of article is to remind myself and everyone who cares enough to keep visiting this page that the blog is still active... even if the blogger doesnt seem to be.
There's been just too much happening the past few months... at work and out of it... I'm currently in the process of reorganizing and renovating my thought process... But then, its just a matter of time when I'll play Terminator.... that's one word to say... I'll be Back!!!!!

Until then, I'm still in hibernation!!
Catch ya all soon enough!!

Cheers!!
Happiness Always!!!

~K.

kab se hoon, kya bataun ...

.. jahaan-e-kharaab mein...
shab-e-hai hijra ko bhi rakhun gar hisaab mein...

said Mirza Ghalib. I'm just quoting it. Translated, it means.. If I take into account the times of separation, it feels like an eternity that I've been in this miserable world...

Me.. I feel the same. I'm separated too. From the myriad dreams that I keep dreaming about. There's just so much that I want... to have... to do.. to be...

The following is an extract from my list of "I want..."
- to own a Mustang.
- to own (at least) 2 pet dogs.
- to own a nice, cozy and warm house in the hills, by a beach, by a river, in Delhi, in NY and somewhere in Rome... (with a nice garage for my Mustang!!) ;-)
- to have a big hall in my house with a home theatre system and watch all classic movies... (including Psycho)
- to study English literature, Arts, Music (both Indian and Western), History, Economics, Journalism, Marketing, Mathematics and Arabic.
- to be able to pack my bags and just travel.
- to sleep for at least 20 hours.
- to really celebrate with all the people I love.
- to sing 'The Great Gig In The Sky' (Pink Floyd) well at least once.
- to sing every other song and raaga well.
- to be able to play the guitar really well.
- to be able to dance well.
- to cook one good meal.
- to eat to my heart's content without getting fat.
- to read a good book.
- to write a good book.
- to swim in the sea.
- to have a clone to go to the office while I stay at home doing one of the things above.
- to get scared out of my wits once.
- to laugh out really loud.
- to play all the games/sports that I like to watch (including F1).
- to sky dive and bungee jump and parasail and paraglide.
- to fly an aeroplane.
- to shake myself out of routine.
- to shake people out of monotony.
- to make a difference.

.. and blah blah blah....

Sometimes I think it's too short a life for the amount of pleasures it offers. But then, I'd read somewhere.. if you want something bad enough... you just might get it!!
I know some of these things are crazy... some, not so...
But then.. that's how I am... half mad... half.. not so.

Cheers anyway!!

Keep smiling!!!

~K.

All you need is love...

John Lennon... smart man!
Sad that he aint alive anymore. He would've written a LOT of beautiful stuff for sure.

Anyway... back to the topic. All you need is love. Is that why I've been screwing up things in my life? Academics.. Engineering wasnt really the love of my life... only I figured it out a bit too late... (duh!!!). Work... Code is still a code to me. And do I even hope to decode it someday? Comments withheld (what if my boss reads this sometime?)

Life has suddenly become too full of question marks.. From acads to work to relationships to everything else... Bah!!! Have I lost it??? Shit.. another question!!!! Damn this punctuation.. Sometimes I wonder if I'd been better off never reading that Wren and Martin book in school.

That apart... think about it... dude had a point... J.L. i mean... when you are busy doing something that you love... you never get tired. Even if it something as "tiring" as working out. If you are thinking of doing something that you love, conviction follows on its own. When you are with people you love, not a moment is dull.. even if it's nothing that you are doing. If you are looking forward to something that you would love, it doesnt matter how forward that forward is.
Maybe that's what the answer to all (my) problems is... all things that seem sad.. bad or miserable... Remember.. to let her into your heart... then you can start.. to make it better!! :D
Beatles again!!
I probably live my life in their songs. Possibly because I love them.

And that'll bring us back to the Lennon dude. Hats Off to him again!! Maybe he's right. Love IS all you need.
Until I move on to another question and another answer.. Let It Be!!!


~K.

Tryst with Mutiny

I, am generally, quick to take offense; and hence quick to defend myself. And when stuck in a situation like that, I can get bellicose, belligerent and even ballistic.
Oh well, balls to all that!
Come to my workplace some time (if you have the access that is…). Some of the calls that happen in and around my bay are typical examples of situations that I was hinting at in the beginning of this article.
You get to learn a lot. For instance – the effectiveness of “danda” (as we call it) as a digestive aid for breakfast, also that you can well substitute your (or mine maybe) morning workout and breakfast with this same danda, only it’ll leave you hungrier than ever for lunch. You also end up having a couple of laughs, but that is strictly subject to the condition that you are able to view the entire scene objectively, and find it funny that you, the belligerent, bellicose, ballistic and blah blah blah type, can get tongue tied at the hands (or is it vocal chords… ;-) ) of one man.

Lessons learnt for today –

1. Do not skip breakfast for the sake of “danda”, unless you don’t mind hogging for lunch… (that too on food you may not be particularly fond of).
2. Know when to fight, when to fight back and when to shut up.
3. Do not even think of fighting without doing your homework.
4. Keep giving yourself an occasional laugh (or at least a smirk!). In other words… stay objective.
5. Bless the soul who put the ‘Mute’ button in the phone sets.

Until more of these "learnings" come in... (I have a funny feeling they'll come pretty quick...) just remember....

"Sab ganda hai par danda hai yeh.... " ;-)

~K.

Chalta hai!

Today while checking out of the hotel, I booked myself a cab for transporting my self and my luggage home. The lady on the other side told me it would be another half an hour before the cab arrives. A half hour and another fifteen minutes into the wait and I began to get impatient, and may I add, a little annoyed as well. So I called up again. And I was told that my cab request hadn’t been placed at all and it would not be possible now to get a cab.

And that’s how it began. My instincts told me to flare up at the moment and give the respective people a piece of my mind for their inefficiency. Thankfully, sanity prevailed and told me to calm down.

Next, I took an auto to go home. The guy overcharged. Which is not just normal, it’s also typical. And again, sanity made me accept it.

Ticked though as I was about the morning’s incidents, one thing I noticed was that life went on normally everywhere around me nevertheless. I know things like these keep happening to everyone, everywhere, almost every time. Am I the only one who bothers so much about all this; or is it really supposed to be shrugged off? Come to think of; there’s so much that we, as a people, have come to accept to the extent of becoming indifferent towards it. Today morning’s incidents are pittance.

Maybe the junta is right. Chalta hai!


~K.

Enjoy the Joyride!!

October 9th, 2005 – I reach Detroit. Around 4:00 pm EST. And like I’d mentioned in one of my previous blogs – a little humbled. That’s when the joyride began. With a little warning for me to buckle up. From the airport to the suite. Through all the subsequent days that I was there in Detroit. Troy, actually.

Let’s see the things that I’ve been up to all this while – work, obviously. And lots of meetings. Hoo boy. Way too many meetings actually.
But the real life was out of all that. On the freeways (I absolutely love that word), driving like a mad woman. In the Tango classes, dancing like one. In that quiet little place called Troy, generally fooling around like one. And in California and St. Louis and New York and Dayton being the mad woman that I actually am.

In the four months of my stay in the US, I came to understand and learn quite a lot of things. I understood, for instance, what the hype of living and working in US was all about. And might I say, it’s quite justified. The place is nice and convenient and all that jazz. The sense of independence that it gives you is quite overwhelming. And if you can manage that, you’re good to go. I really am not sure if a lot of people will really count that as one of the things that working in US teaches you. I do, because independence is something I’ve always sought. And of course, this is my blog not anybody else’s. ;-)

Plus I got a reaffirmation on the importance of families and friends. And how much one depends on them. Seems quite contradictory to what I just wrote. But it’s so true. And however much I try to ignore their say in my life, at the end of it, I know I’m kidding myself. Can I live without seeing them every once in a while (if not everyday)? No. Can I live without talking to them everyday? No. What then was that independence bullshit I was talking about? I wont bother explaining; coz my family members and friends know what I mean. And if other commoners do too, then congratulations! You just passed the first test of being included in that elite class of people who are, you know, smart. :-)

I also realized the importance of planning. That is not to say I’ve learnt how to plan and stuff; but hopefully I will in due course of time. To think of it, I am still confused as to whether I should plan my life and my actions that would govern my life, so that it looks like I am living like my calendar or my planner; or should I let my life lead me to wherever it wants me to go, so that every step is an adventure. It wouldn’t really take a Sherlock Holmes to deduce that so far I’ve subscribed to the latter school of thought. But then, of late, I have seen the difference that “planning” makes to everyday living. One of these days, I’ll make up my mind. I did buy quite some cosmetics from the US. ;-)

And of course, I realized that I CAN cook. Not the gourmet sort of stuff. Leave that to the others; someone must be there to eat it and enjoy it too ;-). But yeah the daily, mundane stuff that keeps you alive for the better part of your life. Heaven be praised. That’s one more item off my checklist. :-)

And I learnt the beauty of the expression called dance. It’s probably among the more honest forms of expressions. You really can’t hide yourself when you are dancing. If you are really dancing that is. Because bodies don’t lie. I can feel something and say something else. Possibly the same with what I write. But with dancing, it’s tough.

What else. Can’t remember more right now. Because I am so flooded with the memories of what the past four months were like. Right now, February 4th, 10:12 am GMT, I am sitting at the Heathrow airport on my way back home. This is the same route that I took while coming to Detroit. And I am carrying the excess baggage of my stay there inside my head. Somewhere inside me I wish I were on a connecting flight to Detroit instead of Delhi. But being the mad woman that I am, I want everything. I want to go home and then back to Detroit. And though it’s not currently on my “calendar”, let’s see if it comes as another adventure that life offers me. That’s the one (joy)ride I wouldn’t mind being taken for. :-)


~K.

ps: The time zone in the blog is back to IST ;-)

Hazaaron Khwaishein Kaisi?

Baanwra Man Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna.

Baanwre se man ki dekho baanwri hain baatein.
Baanwri si dhadhkanein hain baanwri hain saansein
Baanwri si karwaton se nindiya kyon bhaage
Baanwre se nain chahein baanwre jharokhon se baanwre nazaaron to takna.

Baanwri se is jahaan mein baanwra ek saathho
Is sayaani bheed mein bas haathon mein tera haath ho
Baanwri si dhun ho koi baanwra ek raag ho
Baanwre se pair chahein baanwre taraanon ke baanwre se bol pe thirakna.

Baanwra sa ho andhera baanwri khamoshiyaan
Thartharaati lau ho maddham baanwri madhoshiyaan
Baanwra ek ghunghta chahe haule haule bin bataaye
Baanwre se mukhde se sarakna.


-- From the movie Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi.